“You dropped the ball,” the client said to the lawyer.
“I didn’t drop the ball,” responded the lawyer.
“In fact, things would have gone as planned if you’d done what you said you were going to do,” the lawyer continued.
“You should never have let it go down that way,” the client jabbed back. “If you’d been better prepared, this wouldn’t have happened,” he said as anger flared in his eyes.
Save the Arguments for the Courtroom
SLOW. DOWN.
BREATHE.
Inhale, exhale, take some time, and say nothing. Let the client let it out. Keep quiet.
We immediately get defensive. We attack back. We can’t help ourselves.
You can’t win this argument. No one can win this argument. The client isn’t right, isn’t wrong, and isn’t thinking clearly. The client is emotional, upset, sad, mad, and confused. The client needs time to let it go. Don’t jump into the fray.
We already know all of that. We know to keep quiet and let the client run out of gas. We know an upset client is like a big, heavy jet coming in for a landing and needs plenty of runway to slow down. Give your client the runway.
Remember That It’s Not Personal
It’s so hard to remember to give upset clients the space they need to air it all out when they’re attacking us. It feels so personal. It’s upsetting when we’ve worked so hard…tried so hard.
We’re the professionals. We’ve been there, done that (even when we haven’t). This isn’t our first rodeo. We see the big picture, we own this arena, and we get it, but our client is just living it, being it, and experiencing it for the first time. It’s our job not to jump in, not to be defensive, and not to let it escalate.
Let it go. You can’t win this argument. Don’t go down this path.