Calling a prospective referral source for the first time is tough. We all feel a bit hesitant about what to say and how to say it. It reminds us a little of calling someone for a date. We fear rejection. It’s awkward.

Here’s how you do it.

Ideally, you won’t be placing a completely cold call. Hopefully, your call will be a little bit warm. Maybe you’ll have the name of the person who referred you. Or you’ll have met before, maybe long before. Sometimes you’ll have a connection that makes it easier to open the conversation.

If it were a date, you’d be able to say, “Hi, I’m Alice. You know me: we’re in Physics 201 together. I sit on the other side of the room, and we’ve glanced at each other once.”

Okay, I guess it’s clear that I didn’t get many dates, huh?

What if the call truly is cold, almost frigid? What if you have no connection to the person at all?

Here’s how I do it. I call and introduce myself and go for it right off the bat.

“Hi, I’m Lee Rosen. I practice family law here in Raleigh. I’m working on growing my practice, and I’d like to meet you. I’ve heard great things about you, and I’d like to learn a bit about what you’re doing. I’d only need a few minutes, and I’d be happy to come by your office, meet you for coffee, or take you out to lunch. Would you be up for that?”

Shockingly, most everyone I’ve ever called has said “sure” and we’ve proceeded to work out a plan. We usually meet for coffee or agree to have lunch.

The anxiety I have about making the call is almost always unwarranted. The fact is that most professionals want to meet other professionals and are happy you’ve made the call so they don’t have to do it themselves.

On another day, we’ll talk more about what to do at the meeting (hint: listen a lot!). For now, pick up the phone. Make the call. Report back to me and let me know how it went in the comments below.

This is going to be easier than you think!