This lawyer was very proud of the fact that he didn’t have an iPhone, an Android, a Windows phone, or even a Blackberry.

He has a “feature phone.” It’s one of those “dumb phones.” You know, the kind you flip open and push the buttons. It’s mostly for “calling” people. (Who does that anymore?)

He expected me to give him a hard time about his lack of technology. He was all geared up to explain how he was so Zen and all that stuff and that his e-mail could wait. He’s busy floating on his superiority cloud while my phone beeps and buzzes and I respond to iMessages and Snapchats.

Zen and the Art of Mobile Maintenance

Knowing what was expected of me, I went in a different direction (’cause I can’t help myself).

I asked him how he looks at his website. I wanted to know how he checks to make sure it looks the way he wants it to look and that it’s helpful to clients and other visitors.

“I use my laptop when I’m doing that sort of thing,” he responded. “I keep my work at the office. I don’t want it crossing the line into my personal time,” he continued.

“But how does it look on a smartphone?” I asked.

He just shook his balanced Zen head and acted like I was talking about things that didn’t matter once you reached enlightenment.

How to Reach Mobile Enlightenment

I went on to explain that about half of the traffic to our North Carolina Divorce site comes in the form of mobile traffic. Our visitors are viewing the site on their phones (just to be clear here—phones, not tablets).

How can this dude know what his clients are seeing if he doesn’t have an iPhone or something comparable? He can’t, of course. He looked less Zen and more rattled.

I went to his site on my iPhone. It didn’t look good. It was hard to view and formatted all wrong. It might look fine on a laptop screen, but it looks like crap on my phone.

He was increasingly agitated as we talked. His Zen state was ruined. He was getting cranky.

I think he’s on his way to an Apple Store.

My work here is done.