Adding someone new to your referral network is one of the scariest and most exciting parts of generating new business.

The Difference Between Cold Calls and Warm Introductions

It was January 1987, and I was studying for the bar exam. I was living alone in a small basement apartment in Raleigh, North Carolina. I studied for hours but ultimately reached a point each day when I didn’t have anything left to give to the books or recorded lectures. My brain was trashed, worn out, finished.

On one of those cold, late afternoons, I headed to a video rental store (remember those?).

She had dark, black hair. What an incredible smile. She had a wealth of knowledge about the movies for rent in her store. On top of that, she seemed interested.

She was smart. I mentioned that I was studying for the bar exam (thought that might work for me). She said she’d heard that the bar exam wasn’t necessary. I wondered what she could be possibly be thinking.

As we talked, it became apparent that she assumed I was studying to be a bartender. She thought I could simply learn through on-the-job training and that my studying for a test was unnecessary.

Clearly, she was very, very smart. I had found the woman for me. I could tell.

A few minutes later, I asked her about going to dinner. She launched into a long list of reasons why that wasn’t going to happen. She might not have had much knowledge about bar exams, but she was excellent at weaseling out of a dinner invitation.

In retrospect, I suppose that was one of my early “cold” calls. We’d never met before. I hadn’t ever chatted her up at the video store. I didn’t know her or any of her friends.

Cold calls are nerve-racking. Sometimes they’re unproductive. But sometimes, they pay off in a big way.

Fast-forward a couple of years to the way in which I met Lisa (now my wife). I was friendly with an intern in the firm I was working for. The intern and I were chatting one day next to the copier when I mentioned that I needed a girlfriend. The intern offered to do some scouting work for me.

The next weekend, the intern knocked on the door of my apartment. She had a friend with her. We were introduced. One thing led to another, and within a few dates, it was clear that this relationship was off and running. A year later, we were married.

That’s the difference between a cold call and a warm introduction.

An Easy Way to Warm Up Your Introduction

You can add someone new to your network with a cold call. I’ve done it many times. It works. It’s just more challenging than meeting a new person by way of a warm introduction.

Today, it’s easier than ever to warm up your introduction. Making a cold call really isn’t necessary if you will apply any effort to the project at all.

LinkedIn is magical with regard to its ability to help you figure out how to obtain an introduction. You can spend just a few minutes on the site and discover which of your connections are linked to someone who knows the person you’d like to meet.

They talk about the six degrees of separation. I’ve concluded that my LinkedIn network is fewer than six steps to nearly anyone I’d like to meet—anywhere in the world.

I was surprised when I figured out how tightly integrated my network was with everyone else on the planet. I’ve done experiments with others using their LinkedIn network, and we’ve determined that most of us are within a very few steps of knowing just about everyone—seriously.

You’ll be pleasantly surprised if you’ve been on LinkedIn for any period of time at how connected you actually are. It kind of snuck up on me. Without LinkedIn, my friends are just my friends. Add LinkedIn to the mix, and suddenly they are amazing introduction machines.

Of course, LinkedIn is merely a representation of your network. The fact is that you know people who know people, whether it’s all documented on LinkedIn or not. LinkedIn just makes it easier to figure things out.

How to Expand Your Network

Feeling like you don’t really know many people? Feeling insecure about your network?

Stop for a second and think. Being connected to nearly everyone is so much easier than we imagined. You know me (and if you don’t, it would be fairly easy for you to get to know me: just e-mail or call, I already like you). I’ve already figured out how I’m directly or indirectly connected to nearly everyone on the planet. If you know me, then you’re on the road to knowing everyone. See?

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I’m not your only possibility for connection. There are lots of people who are well connected. All you have to do to dramatically increase your ability to connect with “anyone” is to meet one of those people. This really isn’t rocket science.

Once you recognize the power of your network, you begin to realize how easy it would be for you to have warm introductions rather than being forced to make cold calls. A warm introduction is dramatically more impactful than a cold call. You should always strive for a warm introduction when the option presents itself. With LinkedIn, that opportunity presents itself often.

As you begin to think about and explore the depth and breadth of your network, you’ll start to see the connections and see how you can go to one of your contacts and ask for a favor in the form of an introduction to another contact.

Suddenly, instead of being the random guy at the counter in the video store asking for a date (when you may be a serial killer—and for the record, I’m not), you’re the guy who was introduced by a friend. Had I been in that position on that night, I probably wouldn’t have ended up eating a frozen dinner alone in my basement apartment.

If you’ll use your network to get introductions to new people, you too will never again eat alone.